Thank you for tuning in to what's your face story. Today with me is Victoria Rader. She’s an international best selling author and a possibility coach, I always talk about possibilities. And now we have someone else sharing a different viewpoint. So Victoria created a special website for you. It's called www.yu2shine.com and I invite you to visit that site later on. And we're going to be talking about the aspects of the quizzes that you find on her website and what you can learn and how you can uplift your mood in today's economy and the inflation and all those things that we are bombarded with.
But trust me there is hope. It's always helpful to wake up in the morning, open your eyes and look in the window with your own eyes knowing that you're alive and you can change anything that you desire. And so here's Victoria, please take it from here.
Well, thank you, Yolanda for having me and for inviting me to be here with you. And your beautiful podcast literally and figuratively. You know, while you were speaking of hope, and I know we've chatted just prior, a feeling came to me that, you know, sometimes that picture or experience is worth 1000 words. And so I grabbed our app that Empower-me app, and the part of that app is called Mind grief.
And I believe that right now what humanity's what you're describing is processing an immense amount of grief because because grief is an opportunity being lost and mourned over whether it's an opportunity of prosperity opportunity for health, opportunity for peace of mind or purpose. We're grieving a loss of what could have been a lot of us and we're not even aware, unaware that it's grief. And so through my you know, work with clients, I found that there are all 90 aspects of grief that we can be suppressing without knowing it. And indeed, all of them are relieved through that feeling of hope that that you're talking about.
So one of the 90 aspects that popped up for us to process as the beginning of this time together is feeling empty. So you validate I feel empty inside this dark emptiness never goes away. So then you visualize and if you're listening if you want to visualize for 30 seconds, close your eyes and imagine a spark of hope. Being born deep within your chest and filling the space of emptiness with its warm glow. Imagine this warms spread through your whole body. Affirm with your hand on your heart. I now feel the whole being born deep within my empty feeling. First, just a spark. Now a warm flame.
It is it's one of our apps it's Empower- me app and when you look at that little m biggie. That's kind of what I want to talk about because right now, you know over the last couple years that we've gone through a society, people say well these things were not out of my control. I can't wait till life is back in my control. And the irony is that we never control the outcome. And that is just the truth. We only control two things, what is going on internally, and how we perceive what's going on externally? Those are the two things that we have full power and control over. Sometimes you will put the best effort and you will not get the results you want. And this is when you've got to trust that that is still in the best alignment for you keep going do not give up just because you hit a dead end You know, I talk a lot to people who are stuck and they say ahead of feeling to do this. I almost felt it was divine guidance to do this and I followed it and here I am at the dead end and they say okay, you and I are in the woods. We're in the middle of the jungle and we're walking on the path. It's pretty dark and dreary. And we've come to a split in the road. And both you and I we either meditate or pray or focus whatever your practice of alignment with guidance is and we say which way to go. And we both feel to go right. We go right and in short five minutes will come to the dead end and we say wait a minute, why are we here? Why are we at this dead end? Didn't we feel guided and then we're frustrated. We go back? We get on the only correct path. And now we walk on it hour after hour to understand that had we not run into the dead end? We would be questioning whether we're on the right path. Yes. So a part of our experiences right now. I helping us to not question when we get on the right path.
Yes, we have to go through some things in order to find the right answer the right path. Yes. Agreed. Okay. And in essence, we are allowed to be said like, emotionally down. We are allowed to do that and we should stay. Stay home. Don't leave the home when you're like this. Because obviously you're going to affect the people who are immediately surrounding you, your co workers, your family, just stay home and just go through the process of thinking what you're thinking and what causes the sadness, but overcome this and just know that there is hope.
There is a way of finding like Victoria has this wonderful book with 35 laws for life. And one of the laws is the Law of Gratitude.
I would love you to speak to the gratitude because there's always something where we should be grateful for absolutely I love that concept. And that's why it's the first law because it's the beginning law of prosperity. And something that you've said, that's so important is that how to validate your feelings without allowing them to control your life. You know within say say what I'm feeling is an experience but it's not me. I am not my feeling. I'm not my emotion. Emotion is the energy of motion. This energy is here. It is moving through me but is not me and does not define me. And just finding the hope of redefining who you are as you experienced that. And in a nutshell, it's a process of appreciating who you are. And the process of appreciation is the process of gratitude. When we economically see things appreciate when they grow in value. So we we understand that the home appreciates or an asset appreciates it value increases. But in universal laws, everything that we appreciate grows in value. So if you are barely surviving, you have two ways of seeing your life through the glasses of luck or through the glasses of gratitude. So you can look at what you have and say why don't I have more? How much longer can this go? On? And unfortunately, that becomes a way to depreciate the little that you have when you're sick. You're focusing on the disease and you say when will this go away? Why is this torturing me? How unfair is it that I got it and the health further depreciates and deteriorate deteriorates. Or you can say wait a minute, I do have this disease, but look at my other functioning beautiful systems of my body. I have a bug but I can see or I can hear or I can touch or I can move those that cannot move. So there's this energy that is moving through me that is not me, the disease, the energy that doesn't define me. And there's the presence of life in me for which I'm grateful. And when you start appreciating that presence of life in you, you get on the healing journey.
When you start to appreciate appreciating presence of abundance in your life, by see by seeing that so many of your needs are already fully met and by being genuinely grateful for them, you start reframing your mind to start noticing more opportunities to support this new reality of having versus not having. I often joke that Shakespeare was the greatest metaphysician of all time he said to be or not to be. That is the question and nutshell it's to be grateful and create a life to be grateful for or not to be grateful and focus through the prism of lack. The hope is the bridge that gets you out of darkness of despair and into the light of gratitude.
And at the same time, we are really not we are not taking advantage of everything that is given to us the Mother Nature has given to us and we are neglecting ourselves and neglecting the environment the foods that we're eating putting in our body. So some people are gardeners and some people are just going to fast food places and put junk food in the body and that is what what causes that the different diseases or different This eases and of course aging. So what I say is take care of yourself as if someone else was sitting inside of you. You had somebody to take care of. If you don't want to take care of yourself, per se you don't care. Take care of what's inside of you. Because when you get to the point when you're you're down laying down and you're not feeling well. Then what's happening is the universal law of law of attraction is not going to come and help you to attract better health. You need to get better by thinking what what have I done to get to this point? So unfortunately, I don't want you to blame yourself for it. But I think I do.
You know, I think it's very important. If you look at those universal laws and the proceeds from the book, the first law is love gratitude. And the last last law is the law of forgiveness. I think a lot of us find it very hard to take responsibility and make changes because we don't know how to forgive ourselves. And so we hide behind our choices, because acknowledging them is devastating to us. And so the practice of knowing how to forgive fully and completely, how to forgive others and how to forgive yourself without excusing without blaming. Yes, we've all had that family member that caused the trauma. We've all gone through that. Yes, we've all lived in that country that the government is unfair. We've all had gone through that. Yes, we all have a friend or two that betrayed us. We've all gone through that. But there is a part of us that has agreed to learn from those exchanges, and maybe not in the best way. So this is the part we need to forgive, as well as forgive that person, place or thing. A lot of times we're forgiving a person, but we also need to know how to forgive a system or a place or a movement or a memory. Once you understand the power, the true power of forgiveness. You know, I say it's for giving for getting your burdens away so they no longer burden you make you sick and unhealthy or broke, for giving room in your life, for new opportunities for giving yourself a chance to grow and to thrive.
So there's a reason why I start with a Law of Gratitude and finish with the law of forgiveness. There are these two anchors of the universal laws, right? Yes, anytime I see someone in my facial clinic with acne or situations that are temporary, I do talk about the food that we eat what we put in our body but also the stress the thoughts that we put into our minds because that can definitely affect our well being. So the Law of Gratitude is one that I resonate to, and forgiveness forgive yourself as well. If you had us done something that you shouldn't have, like, benched on French fries, I don't know. Something. Don't worry, it's all good. Just take it from there. Step out of it and just realize that this is not healthy for you, for your body and for your well being. So forgiving yourself is a big part in in that too.
And the language that I usually recommend using is a simple freeze off and now right and now it's over or and now I'm going to do this. This is new me. This is like me. So just giving yourself a chance to start wherever you are now, like not three years ago, not five years from now, but now and now I'm going to make this choice. And I think it's a very helpful language to just give yourself permission to move forward without trying to set everything that you've done before, right. It's not your obligation to set it all right. But now you can start creating an alternative. more wholesome reality.
Yes. And there is a lot of information on Google right now to to find and help yourself if you are in need of someone just giving you a little tips and strategies but there's also a lot of misinformation. So once you find somebody who you can align with, just follow them. Usually there is a coaching side the website and you can definitely find a little hope for yourself that you can overcome this and it's all at the end. It's all going to come out to you being healthy and prosperous.
And you know when you when you look at a situation that you might be in, I usually look at the development is three stages of empowerment. So one of the ways to know where you are is to listen to your internal chatter. And so if you feel that things are happening to you, that's the mindset of powerlessness. When you say this happened to me, he she did they did it to me now the next level that is a lot of personal development talk on is seeing how did this thing that happened to me, actually happened for me? So let's say in my life, I had excellent marks in the former Soviet Union to get into the top school but I didn't because these they were only two seats for girls. The rest were from boys and even though I had the best scores compared to boys, I did not get in because they were lower than the top two girls. So I could say this happened to me, right? But at the same time because it happened a year later went to a much better school and not only was a better education, I've met my husband there. So that event happened for me. So it's the next level of empowerment where you go from powerlessness, to being empowered you say these things that are happening to me as they are, how are they happening for me, but it's very important not to get stuck there.
Because that empty news that the app popped up with, I see people that are now shifted out of maybe complaining or blaming reality to Okay, what's next thing what's the next accomplishment and they're never fulfilled either they just going on this you know, we live accomplishments. So that last state of empowerment is to say, How can I have life happening through me? That's a big it's a big alignment. How can I help life happening through me and this is where yonder you talk about so I'm going to be sending food through me since it's coming in coming through me. It's becomes a part of me and a part of who I am. And so you start understanding that all of your exchanges, they are made better if you make them better. They change if you change, because you're allowing for the energy to come through you.
Yes, yes. Take care of yourself and that and your body will take care of you. Yes, so thank you that was so wonderful to hear you, Victoria and I know that we all go through ups and downs, but unfortunately, things will never be perfect in this world, or any other galaxy for that matter. Just check with Elon and it's all gonna be starting from you accepting what is happening right now and moving on learning on whatever just happened and learning and moving on to the next stage which Victoria just described as you learn from your mistakes or you actually have the universe have a better idea for you.
So you don't have to force yourself on something that it's not or it's not happening, because there is something better waiting for you.
Absolutely. I think that the realization is that going back to how we talk that this vision of a delusion of you having control over results once you understand that you're not responsible for the final result, but you're open to receive the best most aligned result, which you are responsible for your efforts towards this result just frees you in a whole new way frees you to live a life fully. And listen to the questions that you ask.
So you can ask if something is happening that is hard to handle. How can I make this better? It's a very powerful question. Your subconscious mind will answer the question you ask how can I make this better? When you receive an answer take the first action towards it. If you're having a fantastic time, do not wait for it to fall apart. Ask yourself how much better can it get with you don't need to sabotage yourself back into survival.
I'm hopeful I am me.